Thursday, October 18, 2012

I'm A Criminal Baby!

..."Shit" I think to myself. All I need to top of my day now is a friggin ticket!

As I approached the intersection on my SE single speed, my mind was preoccupied with the days bizarre events. On top of everything else that had aggravated me today, the traffic was ridiculous going through the Presidio. I hate when people drive below the speed limit while talking to themselves obviously locked into a phone call and every four way intersection becomes a game of "Mexican standoff"..."you go", "no, you go"!

I was in the mindset to at least bust one personal record on a segment of my Strava profile. Since my Klein was broken (that's a story for later) and I was on my 1 gear cannonball on wheels, I figured it would have to be a flat, short segment.
Me and the trusty SE singlespeed...Old picture

Ahhh... "Cemetery East" coming up. How perfect for my F*d up day.

Just as the car in front of me pulled out into the intersection I rolled with it "Hollywood Stop"! Then I blasted into the segment right as I got to full speed I noticed a Motorcycle cop coming the other way who had seen my maneuver coming towards me with cars on his ass. He yelled at me. 

"That's a stop sign"!

I smiled and waved, then looked away and stomped on it. As I started to round the curve I looked back saw the blue light and him turning in the middle of the intersection I had just blasted and heading for me. Fortunately I was way ahead of the cars behind me so I put the pedal to the metal and like a Gerbil on Crack I screamed past the tombstones in a blur. At that perfect moment, I get a phone call and glance at my phone...It's Cathy!
I hit answer and in one breath.

"Honey, I'm running from the cops, call ya back"!

I hang up.

I cut hard to the right up towards the rear of the cemetery figuring the cop would guess I went straight. At this point I was quite a bit from the cut off and I glanced back to see him going straight. I kept my speed up and soon pulled over real tight to the edge of the road where I could see from every angle.
Safe! Now to cautiously wiggle my way out of the Presidio and out through the Marina.

I sleazily pulled through the gate at Fort Mason, went to the far back of the parking lot and locked my bike. I then innocently walked out the gate and began jogging towards the Bridge like a little angel.

Check out the PR on Cemetary Sprint! Faster than I've done on my Klein Road bike!

Kind of Karmic in away due to the fact I was summoned to Superior court this day to testify against a career criminal, meth freak, arsonist who attacked me my wife and tried to set my building on fire a year ago. 
The disgusting Pig Shit Defense Lawyer spent the whole time trying as hard as he could to present me as some kind of bully making up the story and picking on his poor little client! 
I look over at the prosecuting attorney and she's sitting there with a look that could kill at the other lawyer and her lips were silently repeating the F* word.
This was just the preliminary!
I walked out of there feeling so incredibly weirded out...
What the Hell has happened to this world?
I can't write anymore about it at this point.

When I got home I decided to clean up my Klein road bike. Cleaning for me is cathartic  Must be a leftover Catholic purifying compulsion.
As soon as I grab my bike...Arrgh!!! WTF! the headset is completely frozen up. The bearings are seized up. Two days before I have to race on this thing. 
I just sink...
Screw it, I gotta get out of here before I slap someone.
I throw my cage pedals on my Tank and fly out the door and down towards the Marina...

Felt better today, got some work done and just focused on my Klein and began the chore of disassembling the headset. When I got it apart I realized that the bearing seals had folded up probably due to the fact that the labeling had never been taken of during the original assembly! It had bound up the headset after almost ten years usage and very well I could have gotten in a serious accident had this happened on the road.
The assembly was done by a shop that I will not mention due to the fact this happened a long time ago and a bad mechanic caused this. I can't disparage a shop that probably has come along way since that time with probably very good employees.

Duathlon Saturday and at least I feel somewhat comfortable with with my equipment.

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